Held a few days before the holiday, the “mock Seder” or “Steak ‘n Seder,” as some sponsoring rabbis call them, are a modern twist on the model Seders that synagogues have sponsored to prep their congregants.
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Unlike staid practice sessions of old, these promise flowing alcohol, macho food and male bonding along with some religious instruction, although that last one can get a bit lost at some of the events.
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The organizers of these “Guy” Seders have tended to be Orthodox rabbis, though some Reform congregations have also held male-only Seders using a special men’s Haggada, the book that contains the chants and prayers that accompany the Seder meal. The rabbis say that while they themselves are Orthodox, the men who attend range from observant to secular and unaffiliated.
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“Men are deserting synagogues,” says Jonathan Sarna, a professor of American Jewish History at Brandeis University. “Some of this male bonding is designed to reinforce the sense that the synagogue is a place for men.”Prof. Sarna points to the “feminization” of Judaism—where women became more dominant in a religion where men were traditionally the leaders—as helping to explain the new machismo.
Lucette Lagnado, “Why Is This Seder Different From All Other Seders? Scotch”, The Wall Street Journal (26 March 2015), A14.